Auditions were hard, and unfortunately didn't get into those (pray that I get in next semester, or just minor in commercial music). Lol does this make me an awful person I'm trying to kiss up to the piano assistant professor? (who denied me)-so talented as taught in University of Miami frost music school whoo hoo and trying to see her performance on piano sept 17 so she will see favor in me at my core (she said something that I am talented and passionate in wanting to pursue this but something in the errors in the memorization section of the pieces). I think IT'S controversial (I must not lean on my own understand but lean on God for understanding) but also good to put one's best foot forward.
Pls excuse the laundry list format, everything in my brain is just so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so difficult to unclutter lately..
Homesick. I Visit Davie Often.
Joined A Music Ensemble. #tbttotheoledaysofplayingflute #piccolo #goowls(Fau)
Roommate is fine; she is quiet like me LOL. Thankfully we both commute to work /both have cars tho I couldn't care less if she didn't she could hitch rides with me(turnoff for me personally is someone who is undisciplined and in general anyone who projects himself/herself as clingy person) and have our social lives outside of each other- we get along. WE just coexist, and that's fine;; hehe what about the suitemates you ask? well *sighs* that's another story and that's outside my locus of control.
Aye change is so damn hard.. I don't like also that I keep taking on (all simultaneously) commitments and then dropping them. (serving, joining extracurricular student government like o'le high school days, stopping violin lessons by paying my last installment of violin lessons with my teacher, not showing up to group lessons, vowing to work on hair maintenance and then failing haha, controlling acne on my face). I have called a break from my piano student but still haven't followed up with her..and she's patient ( and s/o to the myer(s) both the student and tiger mom love you..)
Been full time student until yesterday, I was stressed out, so now I'm 3/4 time student.
Guiding the other employees(not manager nor boss but a "trainer") like what a leader does...if you don't know what "leader means" you encouraged to look it up in the "webster's dictionary" or "webster online" pretty fine considering that I lowered the frequency I show up to work since it's far from school and so busy with school.
Humility, confused but rebuked on the definition of that God has been showing me a great deal of it. And refining the concept of that. Praise God.
And also there has been a hole in my heart, I haven't felt this numb since my relationship (breakup I mean) with my ex 2013.
I Have A Block of scripture to encourage with y'all and it's something that God is reinforcing In My Depths Of Brokenness:
"v.16 but the face of the Lord is against those who is evil, to blot out their name from the Earth v17 the righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles v18 The Lord is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit"
-Psalms 34:16-18 NIV
Let's take a look at this. Keywords "to blot out their" "against" "delivers" "all their troubles" "in spirit", these are words given to the believer who is on his walk (however long and is going through trials-may I even interject and say, that this may imply that this is "treacherous" and "muddy" but the keywords I pulled out from this scripture that the believer never ever lost his/her "salvation" and is in Christ...nothing that God's children does can ever pull him/her away from God as long as they had that authentic holy spirit to begin with. Anyway let's take a look at the commentary: they offered that with the hardships and struggle one was going through its none in comparison (the length of duration) of the arrival of the ultimate destination-"heaven". The bible character in verse 16 is also heavily coming upon "discontentment"..and the the facial expression is very evident on his face. And the commentary's mention of "nigh" must be referring to the followup of the moment of truth despite the crushed state of the bible character--> product is the believer (God's child) humility being taken under dock to God's hands. The commentary continues and says "God's providence" is moving towards the people (holy spirit believers) whose obedience that naturally outflows from the "crushed spirits's will in long-run be blessed. THE hard trying times that comes with the long race in honoring and following Jesus propels us to give up, YET as we die to ourselves and surrender ourselves to his will we are operating in to God's glory/see his glory unfold itself and doing our job equipping in his kingdom. I tip my hat off to you, thank you for striving to live your lives like Christ. I also tip my off to those who haven't been saved because I want to.
The key is this, whatever you are going through, do not lose hope- Phillippians 2:14-15 "Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people."
references (MLA):
Biblegateway. 2015. Web. Accessed 05 Sept 2016.
BibleHub. 2004 Web. Accessed 05 Sept 2016
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